


Playing The Villain

by princey_pie



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Crying, Eventual Comfort, Implied Self-Harm, Yelling, a tiny bit of violence (only mentioned tho), mentions of abuse, self-hate
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-09
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-04-20 12:11:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14260698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/princey_pie/pseuds/princey_pie
Summary: All Virgil ever wanted was to protect Thomas and the others. So when Deceit decided to visit him after the "Can Lying Be Good" video things went downhill from there...





	1. The Visit

Deceit towered over the younger side. Virgil was on his knees before him, beaten but not broken. Well, not yet.

"You know, I didn't expected it to be this easy. First I planned to do the usual. Draw your friends away, strip you of your support to weaken you in order to carry out the fantastic plans I have with Thomas. Imagine how disappointed I was when I realized that all my plotting was good for nothing."

The sudden hitch in the others heavy gasps for air was the only sign that he was listening.

Virgil's gaze was still locked on the shoes of the snake before him, head lowered in surrender like it has been for a while now. He had no idea how much time had passed since Deceit had entered his room and caught him with a surprise attack. 'Really, what is it good for to always be on guard when not at the one time it actually mattered?' He should have known better than to think that the Dark Side would just give up after being exposed in the last video.

"Not to misunderstand, I simply didn't need to do anything. The things they said about behind your back, even I couldn't have thought of something so cruel. Well, after all, Roman isn't Creativity for nothing. Even your precious Patton..."

Virgil's head snapped up only for his sight to meet Deceits grinning eyes.

"You're lying", he finally managed to spat out at that damned snake's face.

"Actually the joke here is, that I am for once not. I'm just telling a truth you don't like, Anxiety." Deceit now practically purred with satisfaction. He watched as a stream of various emotions crossed Virgil's features, under others there was denial, then heartbreak and finally something he couldn't quite put his finger on.

A deep sigh echoed through the room as Virgil dropped his head again. As he looked up, his eyes darted across the room without actually focussing anything. Then, a little smile grew on his lips. "It's not like I didn't know."

Deceit took a step back, more than slightly taken aback by the younger's mood swing. "I beg your pardon?", he asked, not used to be given right so easily. He felt like he was missing something.

"I just hoped that I had more time before even Patton stopped trying. It was nice, having someone, just for once", Virgil continued as if talking to himself. "But I knew it wouldn't last", he added barely audible, "I'm simply not worth the effort."

For once, Deceit was at loss for words for full three seconds before he caught himself again. "Now Anxiety, Virgil, my friend, I'm really glad that we agree on something at last. Don't you see it's much easier this way without all the fighting? To repay them their actions, I suggest that we team up and-"

"No."

"Huh?" Deceit looked, surprised at the interruption, at the hooded figure that was now facing him, suddenly taller than him. 'When did he get up?'

"I said no", Virgil said far more calm than he was actually feeling. "I don't want revenge. I simply told you that so that you know you can't threaten me. Not anymore."

Deceit's voice became that chuckling undertone again. "Oh, now you suddenly think that you got nothing to fear? You, the literally embodiment of fear itself?"

"No, I simply got nothing to lose." 'Or win', not that Virgil was going to say that out loud. He'd never felt so tired in his life, and coming from him it meant quite something, he just wanted Deceit to leave. Not that he ever got what he wanted, not without scaring others to death. It didn't matter if his opponent was one of the sides or Thomas.

"But Darling", Deceit tilted Virgil's chin up with a single gloved finger, "don't say that. The things it makes me want to do to you." Deceit shook his head.

Virgil poured every single bit of strength he had left in his smile before he smacked the other's hand away. "Try your worst then. Don't think that you can top the things I'd done to myself." He never saw Deceit nervous but now the other side looked downright terrified while muttering something about having to go.

The second he vanished Virgil's smile dropped and he collapsed on his bed. How he hated to play the villain and yet he was so fucking good at it.


	2. The Next Day

Virgil woke up from a particularly good nights sleep, knowing that Deceit wouldn't dare to pull something off that night. The world greeted him with a knock on his door, thank goodness, that it was still locked, he still looked like hell from Deceit's attack.

"Hey kiddo, you up?" Patton's voice echoed through the wood. "I made lunch if you want any."

"I'll be right there!" Virgil answered in the direction of the door before he dragged his feet out of bed and into his bathroom. 'I was wrong', he taught after looking in the mirror, 'Hell must look a lot better than me.' Two thick purple bruises were forming on his chin, where Deceit punched him, and on his forehead, from where he hit his head on a cupboard while falling down. There was no way that he could cover them with makeup. All he could do was to hope that the others wouldn't care enough to ask. Virgil sighed, shoulders dropped and he pulled the hood of his hoodie up. 'At least the colors are matching', he thought as his eyes got caught on the purple pieces of fabric attached to his new hoodie. He then sunk out to face the others.

He reappeared in the living room, not the kitchen, not wanting to startle the others. He lowered his head, the hood now throwing deep shadows over his face and followed the happy sounds coming from the kitchen.

"Good morning, kiddo!" Patton greeted him, excited as ever, as he sat down in his chair, in front of Logan. He muttered a response, while Logan said from behind his notebook: "Patton, you could hardly count this time to the morning hours, but if you simply wanted to express a greeting, I will do so myself. Good morning, Virgil, I noticed that your sleep pattern became even more irregular than usual. Is there a certain reason for it?"

'Well, anxiety kinda does this to you, Logan.' "No, everything's like always."

Before Logan could answer a tornado of white, red and gold rushed into the kitchen and plunged into the chair next to Virgil. All while singing, which doubled Virgil's headache, he didn't know he had until now. But after all, he fell into a cupboard, with his luck he probably had a concussion. Or two.

"Greetings to our prince of darkness as well. What have you been up too? Haven't seen you yesterday at all." The grin that came from Roman was almost convincing. Almost. It was just a little too wide. It's not like he actually wanted to know. They never did.

"Nothing Princey", the nickname felt dry in his throat. "Just nothing."

At that point, Logan chimed in. "Beside the fact that it is simply impossible to do nothing at all, I heard some concerning noises from your room. It didn't want to invade your privacy, but Virgil I have to ask if everything is alright?"

'Of course, you have to. But you didn't care enough to look into it immediately.' He couldn't blame him though. Not when he didn't actually wanted Logan to interrupt yesterdays scene, but sometimes the other sides hypocrisy was tiring. Not that he blamed any of them. To be exact, everything was simply draining too much energy. Patton placing the plates with macaroni on the table luckily spared him of an answer.

Just as he wanted to start to eat, the typical offended Princey noises could be heard beside him. "Virgil, you can't seriously want to even eat with your hood up." With that, he yanked the hood down. The light of the kitchen hit Virgil's eyes with full force. 'Yes, definitely a concussion.' Pain shot through his head and he tried to suppress the need to vomit, right there, as well as the urge to hiss at Roman. He was really proud of himself to say that he did neither. Then he saw the shocked faces of the others and his stomach dropped for a whole different reason. 

'They saw. Of course, they saw, they're not that blind after all. And now they will want an explanation, they find out what I am, they'll send me back, they couldn't even pretend to like me after hearing that even Deceit is scared of me, they-'

"What the fuck happened?!" Hearing Patton curse was more than a slight shock and Virgil stared at him with wide eyes. "I want to know who hurt my kiddo!"

"Patton, please calm down a little. I assume that these bruises are the outcome of the disturbance in your room last night?" Logan's voice was as controlled as always, Virgil was sure that he imagined the slight waver at the end of the question.

Virgil simply nodded, eyes now glued to the table surface in front of him. "I-", he swallowed, "He caught me by surprise."

Logan's eyebrows skyrocketed. "Who? Given your normal behavior that is very unlike you."

'Yeah, thanks for rubbing salt in the wound, man.' Virgil shrugged.

"But who attacked you then?" Logan asked again.

"Logan, it's really no big deal-", he sighed.

"No big deal?!" Patton screamed. "Look at your face, Virgil!"

"Believe me, it looks worse than it is." 'After all, I'm used to it.' He collected all his willpower to push the upcoming memories down again. He couldn't face them now, or ever.

"Falsehood." Logan's voice was cold and his gaze could have cut through steel. "I don't know who you're trying to protect or why, but I think that I speak for the three of us when I say that we want the whole story. Now."

Again Virgil had to fight a wave of memories, of a different voice barking commands at him, back in the subconscious while Deceit cackled in the background. "Deceit, he-"

Roman who has been awfully quiet until now jumped to his feet. "Deceit, that foe, that lying snake, I shall not rest until my sword had cut his traitorous tongue! He-"

"Roman, please calm down as well. Let Virgil finish." Logan was Logic for a reason after all.

"Well, as I said, he came to my room, caught me by surprise and then he left." 'Why couldn't they just let it go?'

"Did he say something?"

"I suppose nothing important."

"Every single bit of information is important. The common saying: Know your enemy, applies here in every single meaning possible."

"I already knew everything he told me, okay? No new information here."

Roman nodded to himself: "Not a surprise. I mean, you obviously know him better than any of us does. You spent a lot of time with him and the others after all." Virgil felt like throwing up again. 'But I didn't want to! I hated every single moment!' he wanted to scream and yet he didn't.

"Logan, what's wrong?" a concerned Patton asked the other side, who was starring intensely at Virgil, wearing a slightly alarmed face.

"Virgil, you know better than to trust Deceits words, don't you? Whatever he tried to sell you as the truth, it isn't."

"Well, of course, Verge knows that", Patton said confused. "He was the one who discovered Deceit first when he impersonated me."

"That is true, Pat. I simply meant that a lie we want to be true is hard to reject."

All eyes were on Virgil again as he slowly stood up. "Uhm, I think I'm going back to bed if you don't uhm, have more questions?"

"Of course, kiddo, rest is the best medicine after all."

"That is only particularly true", Logan answered with a frown, "but I will come with some ice and a few painkillers to your room later."

"Yeah, but wait. What I don't understand is, how did you get Deceit to leave?" Roman suddenly asked before Virgil could leave the kitchen.

"I told him to", he answered quietly, eyes still focused on the floor.

Roman looked annoyed. "Well if he is so eager to listen to you, why didn't you tell him to fuck off last video, right the moment you discovered him?"

'But I did, didn't I? True, it wasn't enough. I'm never enough. Believe me, I couldn't do more not without scaring any of you to death. Because I didn't want you to hate me even more. Because I don't want you to kick me out. Because I can't go back. Because-' He snapped out of his thoughts, realizing that Roman was still expecting an answer. He couldn't tell him any of the reasons that were stomping through his brain.

"That was different", Virgil managed to stutter. He ignored the unbelieving look on Roman's face, Logan's still concerned expression and worst of all Patton's barely hidden disappointment as he fled the kitchen. Sometimes the main sides scared him more than the dark ones ever could.


	3. The Play

A few weeks passed since the Deceit incident and the mindscape fell back into normality. The bruises on Virgil's face have healed well, thanks to Logan's treatment. But the resting peace was a simple illusion. One too easy to shatter. And it did break, hard.

It started pretty harmless. Virgil was as usual in his room. He was there quite a lot now, not talking much with the others despite the uncomfortable greetings and tensed silence at the meals. It hadn't been a good month for Virgil. 

Although they didn't mention the meetup with Deceit again, he just knew that they were thinking about it. He saw it in Romans suspicious glance whenever he excused himself from a group activity, heard it in Patton's sad footsteps whenever he couldn't bring himself to answer the door and he felt it when Logan examined him like one of his science projects. He knew that they didn't like him, not much at least, he was just a necessary nuisance to them. But to see it was a whole lot worse. To feel that they didn't trust him, to know that they feared he would team up with Deceit. As he would even dream about considering that snake as an ally. He knows him too good for that. Him and his friend. Virgil shuddered.

A fist banging on his door knocked him out of his thoughts. "Hey, hot topic! I need you for something! I expect to see you at the theatre asap!" Then Virgil heard footsteps running down the hall. He grunted as he pushed himself up from the floor and sank out. And he appeared right in front of Logan who was already sitting in the first row. And Logan, Logic itself, jumped and squealed. 'Shit, I must look worse than I thought.'

"Sorry man didn't mean to scare you."

Logan was interrupted before he could answer. "Don't you dare apologize, Virgil, for that is exactly the vibe we need today!"

Virgil turned to face the stage, seeing a very excited Roman bouncing on the spot. 

"And what exactly do you need me for now?"

"See, my dear fellow, that I had written a play and the others agreed on helping me to act it out. Patton's gonna be my damsel in distress, Logans gonna watch to give hints on how to improve. He will also be the narrator. Remy promised to play the villain but since he isn't here, you're the lucky one to take on that part." With that, he tossed a script at Virgil.

Virgil felt as Roman had kicked him in the stomach. 'Playing the villain. Again.' He would like to ask why, but he god damn knew why. Art imitates life after all.

"Roman, I'm sorry, but I don't think that's a good idea...", his voice trailed off.

"Come on, kiddo, no reason for stage fright. You're our favorite little darkling, you'll do wonderful, I know." Oh, Virgil wasn't worried that he wouldn't be convincing, he was worried that he'll be too convincing. Too much to be written off as an act. 

"I thought it would be a nice thing to spend some more time as a family", Patton continued. 

Virgils brain short-circuited at the word family. There was no way in hell he could say know now. Not when there was a chance that not everything was lost. He could just hold himself back, right?

"Ok, let's do this."

\-----------------------

"The next scene would be the grand finale", Logan exclaimed, eyes switching between the script and the stage, "in which the hero aka Roman has to rescue his lover from the villain. It also includes the typical villain speech. Patton that means you're standing behind Virgil, both of you facing Roman."

Just as directed everyone went into position. Virgil finally dared to relax, it went not bad until now, he seemed to manage to play a satisfying villain with slipping into his scary self. Only one more scene, a few cliché dialog lines that no real enemy would ever say and it would be done and over. Even he couldn't screw that up as long as he stuck to the script.

"Ok Roman, your turn", Logan started the scene.

The prince throwed himself into pose and began: "Do not fear my love for your prince has arrived. Be gone you foul shadow and leave this kingdom behind to never return or you shall suffer the most horrible death for your actions!"

Virgil clutched the script, he was still holding, tighter and read out loud his line, trying to give his voice some power: "You shall never have him for he to fall for my evil plan of world domination. Both of you are doomed now that you are in my realm."

Virgil already knew that this line wasn't going to pass as acceptable before Logan interrupted. "Virgil, I can't seem to fail to notice that you have some troubles to get into character."

Virgil had to hold back a snort. He wouldn't have taught that that would be a problem. Instead, he answered with a shrug: "I just don't think the words fit."

Roman gasped behind him: "You dare to doubt my script?!"

Virgil turned, really trying to keep his cool: "Not the script, just some of the villain's lines are so..." He made a vague gesture.

Roman opened his mouth to fiercely protest, but Patton jumped in: "Roman, kiddo, you wrote an amazing script. Nobody's perfect at everything. You write such good heroes, so is it really such a catastrophe when villains aren't your thing? Plus you can always improve on that if it bothers you."

Roman's face immediately lit up with Patton's words. "Of course you're right Pat. I'm a prince after all. I've got no business with the twisted thoughts of a dark foe."

Logan adjusted his glasses. "Virgil, given your previous protest against the script I assume that you got some ideas of your own for that character. For that, I suggest that we improvise the last scene." 'Well, shit, and gone was the script. Well done Virgil. Amazing how you always manage to sabotage yourself.'

Patton squealed. "Ohh, that's gonna be so fun! Even more surprising moments!" Patton made his puppy eyes at Virgil. "Oh please, kiddo, you're gonna try it, won't you?"

Virgil hesitantly nodded. He could never resist when Patton used that look on him.

Roman jumped to his position again and shouted: "Hey Doom and Gloom, don't even dare think of half-assing this, you hear me? If you're not willing to follow my perfectly fine script at least make a little bit of effort."

Virgil felt heat pooling in his stomach. He just knew that without a script he would mess this up big time. And if Roman doesn't stop screaming he wouldn't be able to hold himself back for long. Not when his opponent was Roman himself. The other could drive him to the edge like no one else and all while laughing. 'Shit.' He needed to calm down.

But then Romans last words finally got recognized by his brain: "I want a villain that's worth my attention, not some pathetic quiet thing." That was the last straw. Virgil heard a shrill noise ringing in his ears, something he could only identify as rage. 'Pathetic?! Everything but NOT THAT!' He willed his fists to stop shaking as he walked to his position in front of Patton. He nearly missed Logan beginning over the sound of blood pumping through his ears. 'Roman wanted a villain? Oh, then he will get one. One that's everything but NOT FUCKING WEAK.'

Virgil felt himself slip into a well-known role and for once he didn't try to hold back. And did it feel great. He felt FREE.

Roman was mid-speech about rescuing his true love when Virgil let his sarcastic laugh bubble out. Roman stopped confused, for once not in control, it felt just so good. To be in control for once. To have the power to make Roman listen.

"Aren't you a great prince? Look at yourself, so confident, so handsome, just so goddamn perfect", Virgil practically hissed the last word. "Sadly everyone knows it's all just a facade, a pretty one, yes, but shallow. Do you really think that you could save anyone?"

Roman looked shocked, yet Virgil had to admire his stubbornness as he struggled to find his balance to reply. Others would have been petrified by now. 

"Well, actually-", Roman tried to clear his throat. "At least, I am still a prince. I'm simply better than-" Virgil didn't plan on letting him finish. YEARS of suppressed anger and humiliation finally breaking free. Roman's bad luck that he happened to be there as an easy target.

"Look at you now, then. Who are you gonna fool? I see right through you. You made it so very obvious with every insult, every selfish remark, every hurtful moment you shut others up to drag yourself into the center of attention. Just how rotten inside you really are."

He could hear Patton behind himself shifted his weight uncomfortably from one foot to the other: "Uhmm, kiddo, don't you think we should take a little break."

That seemed to help Roman gain a little bit of strength back. "Yeah, Pat, I too think it's enough."

"Ohh such words from your mouth Princey. But you never stopped either, didn't you? You never knew when it was enough with your pranks. Well, guess what, I actually did learn something from you in that department." 

Virgil laughed, it was a terrible twisted, thundering sound and goodness did he loved it. He couldn't remember when he'd last felt so good. He finally had enough of hiding. Of course, he would regret this afterward but at this exact moment, it just felt right to let go.

"Am I pathetic now, Roman? Or this is evil enough for you? You did want this, right? Me as the villain? Did it ever occur to you Prince Charming that I DON'T LIKE BEING WRITTEN OFF AS EVIL?!"

Roman was as pale as his uniform by now. "But you sure don't act like that now."

"Because you never listen until I do! None of you, none of the others, not even Thomas! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DO MY JOB WHEN EVERYONE REFUSES TO LISTEN?! WHAT CHOICE DID I HAVE THAN LET MYSELF BE FORCED IN THE NEVERENDING VILLAIN ROLE?!" 

Virgil breathed in, gasping for air, feeling a wave of exhaustion wash over him. "You're just all the same." He needed to close his eyes for a second as the memories of them rose up again. Channeling so much power to the point where his voice grew this demonic always made him want to sleep for a century and having to deal with his fucked-up past didn't exactly help with that.

As he opened them again he saw the remains of a disaster, the one he caused. Roman stood in the middle of the stage, all blood drained from his face. Logan stood in front of his seat, holding a crying and shaking Patton in his arms, shielding him. Shielding him from Virgil. He hadn't even noticed when the oldest side had left the stage.

Virgil opened his mouth to apologize, to say- what? Then the worst part of this was that he meant what he said, only the how he did it was more than a little questionable. He sunk out.


	4. The Aftermath

The aftermath of Virgil's outburst was terrible. Logan didn't know what to do and that was a whole new experience for him. Roman appeared to be still frozen in shock and Patton was uncontrollably sobbing into Logan's shirt. He could feel his heart crumble in on himself as he rethought the point, Virgil, just so unmistakably loud made. Even when he couldn't understand every single bit, he did understand just how hurt and frustrated the anxious side must have been to step out of line that much. 

These feelings probably boiled in him for far longer than the few weeks since the incident, meaning it was merely the point where they noticed that something about Virgil's reaction to the snake was off. But instead of keeping their promise to work on acceptance they fell into old patterns, ignored the problem and even deepened the issue by forcing Virgil into the villain role once again. They really should know better by now.

"Logan?" Roman's voice sounded thin and barely reached him from across the stage. "Do- Do you think I ruined it for good now? Do you really think that he hates us, hates me?"

"I refuse to believe that. But there are some things that we don't know about Virgil and in my opinion, it's about time we make an actual effort to find out and help our friend." Logan simply kept that gnawing doubt in his stomach to himself that Roman could be right. He never saw the other so angry, demonic voice screaming with rage. He never saw Virgil as scary, scared yes but never the cause for the fear. Logan didn't like that change. He didn't like it one bit.

\---

A few hours later the three main sides had calmed down and gathered in the commons, refreshed yet still slightly shaken.

"I think we really need to talk about what happened?" Patton finally said since none of the other two seemed too eager to start. It almost sounded as he would hope they would say no.

"I believe to think that it would be more beneficial if Virgil would actually be present for that conversation," Logan stated, pushing up his glasses with a single hand.

"I doubt that he would want that… he looked so-" Roman made a helpless gesture not quite finding the right words to describe what he felt.

"He certainly isn't in his room, I checked before coming here," Patton said with a frown, "you-you don't think he left for real now, don't you? Logan?"

"I highly doubt that Patton," he sighed, "he always aimed to protect us, and Thomas even more. He's not the kind of person to just leave, I'm sure he's just taking a little break where he feels safe."

"And that isn't here…" Roman again felt the need to swallow back tears.

"Lo, what do we do?" Patton looked up at him with trusting eyes.

"I- I don't know. At this point, we have no way to reach Virgil and we also don't know where to search for him. Thomas might be able to summon him but he could still refuse to appear, besides that our host is currently unavailable given that his friends are currently visiting."

"Yeah, it's not like we can just pop up in the living room while they're there." Roman furrowed his brows. "Then what about someone who's overall more familiar with the dark side of the mindscape?"

Logan nodded: "It might be a start. You got so someone particular in mind?"

Roman took a breath and yelled: "Hey Remy, get your caffeine-drunk ass here!"

The function teleported right in front of Patton who jumped a startled step back. "Oh, how could I not when I'm asked so lovely. So guys tell Remy what's the issue that you call for me in this ungodly early hour?"

Logan raised one eyebrow. "It's 3 pm."

Remy looked at him, face expressionless: "I know."

Before Logan could comment that Patton started to explain the situation: "Virgil's missing and we hoped you could tell us where we could start looking."

Remy sighed: "He vanished again?" He turned to look at Roman. "What did you do now?" 

His poker face stayed perfectly in place at Roman's offended gasp: "Why do you assume that it's my doing?!"

A moment of silence passed.

"Okay you're right but you can't just assume I'm always at fault. It was just a play and then Virgil snapped and now he's gone and the things he said…"

Remy sighed again. "Let me guess, you made him play the villain role again?"

"How-" Patton's mouth fell open.

"Ah you know, good ol' Virge and me talk quite a lot. You don't even have to tell me what he said, I can imagine it quite vividly," he answered Patton's unfinished question. "I mean after all the shit that bastard put him through, I'm not even surprised," Remy then mumbled as like speaking to himself.

"We are aware that Virgil and Deceit have some kind of past but I fail to see how-" Logan started before being interrupted by Remy's firm head shake.

"Oh no, I'm not talking about Deceit. I mean that dude got some fucked up priorities and definitely needs to look in a mirror but he's not evil. His pranks aren't great taste okay but compared to the others and especially him he's as tame as a cotton candy cloud. Plus Virgil always knew how to get rid of that snake if he truly wanted too but that other guy, the-" Only then Remy took in the confused faces of the other three and his eyes, for once not hidden behind sunglasses, widened in realization. "Ohhh, he didn't tell you."

"Tell us what?" Roman snapped, his nerves slowly getting the better of him.

Remy shook his head: "I don't think that I should Roman, it's Virgil's place to tell, not mine."

"But if you don't, we can't help him. We messed this up and I don't know how to fix it and-" a little sob escaped Logan before he could suppress it. The others froze in shock at the sudden emotional outburst from the otherwise so rational side.

"Hey hey honey", Remy tried to comfort him a little bit awkward, resting both hands on his shoulders, "Y'all be alright, okay? So don't stress that pretty face with too many tears." He took a deep breath, sorting his thoughts for a moment. "So I suppose you don't know how the dark equivalent of the mindscape looks like. Let's just say it's not nice okay? I've been there for a few times, honestly tried to stay away most of the time. And they have this form of hierarchy. It's basically whoever's on top is giving the orders and the others have to follow or expect to be punished."

He quickly glanced behind Patton's eyes became wider and wider with every one of his words.

"Look, I don't think that you really want to hear this-"

"But we have to. It's time to stop half-assing actions for our stormcloud. Let's stop pretending we didn't. And I may be the main force behind that." The last sentence was almost whispered by Roman.

"Don't beat yourself up over it Roman, we're all at fault here. We didn't put that amount of effort in that we promised," Patton quickly countered and pulled the prince into a tight hug.

"Remy please continue," Logan added with a nod to the function that was watching with a stills skeptical expression that softened being addressed.

"Very well. The guy on top is necessarily the worst of the whole bunch, I don't think he's even aside anymore. He used to be called impulse. You know that feeling when you're standing on a high building and a little voice tells you to jump? He's that. And he's powerful." Another deep breath. "But so is Anxiety. Our dear Virgil just never realized that, I don't think he does today, not fully anyway."

"What happened?" Patton wished with all his heart that Remy would make a joke, the serious attitude on the extravagant and rebellious man was unsettling.

"He got nowhere else to go so he became- yes what? That's a good question actually. I think the most fitting position would be a weird mix of second in command and their plaything." Remy gritted his teeth. "They used him for his powers to try to establish the pathetic little bit of control they thought they could gain on Thomas and then punished him when it didn't work. You have to understand that Virgil absolutely could have done it but he simply refused to."

"And he participated in that for years voluntarily?!" Patton shrieked.

"Not any more than a cat participates in swimming when being thrown in the ocean. It got no other choice if it wants to survive."

The three stood in shock and somehow even awe. "He even protected us then and we didn't realize any of it", Logan was the first to break the silence.

Roman's eyes began to dangerously burn with fire: "I don't care how powerful that son of a biscuit is, I'm gonna find him and rip his rotten heart out for what he'd done. Forget the dragon-witch, he's the real beast I should be hunting!" The others were too distracted by the beginning of Roman's outburst to notice the small shift in the air when Virgil appeared behind them in the commons.

"I'll save you the search then," he exclaimed making the other three jump and turn to fave him at once, "here I am, do what you have to, I just want to sleep."

"Kiddo no," Patton softly said and tried to not feel his heartbreak at how awfully tired Virgil looked, not just physically but also mentally drained and how the tiniest shimmer of hope seemed to appear on his face at the nickname only to die at the same moment. "He wasn't talking about you, Verge. Remy told us a little about your time with the dark sides."

Virgil paled even more and held his hands up as to signal peace: "Listen, I know you're mad but I can explain-"

His words were cut off when a white blur with a red sash threw himself across the room, collided with Virgil (who definitely didn't scream) and swept him into a tight hug: "Don't you dare apologize, Panic At The Everywhere! That's my part for today and it should have been for the last years. I'm so sorry Virgil for how we- how I treated you and I hope that you someday can forgive us. I understand if you wouldn't but," Roman audibly swallowed, tears finally spilling, "please don't do that again. Don't you ever dare to just vanish and leave us behind? Virgil please…" He couldn't put into words how much they needed their shadowling. 

Then he noticed a wet patch growing on his shirt. Quickly he took a step back, hands still on the anxious side's shoulders, not quite ready to let him go. He panicked at the sight of tears on the other's cheek, smearing the dark eyeshadow: "Oh triton's trident, Virgil I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you, I-"

"Oh shut it Princey, I'm fine", he whipped the liquid off with his hand, smearing the makeup even more, "It's just nice to hear that you see more in me than a villain, that you actually like me even after I said these things…"

"Kiddo, of course, we all love you!" Patton exclaimed and swept the other two into one of his famous bear hugs.

"Indeed it appears that we didn't put that particular statement to enough use, which should be fixed in the future, probably adding to signs of physical affection," Logan stated even though the dried tear tracks were still visible.

Virgil smirked: "Is that your way to say that you would like to join the group hug?"

Logan gave a sharp nod.

Patton gasped and he almost made his typical heart eyes: "Then what are you waiting for?! Come here, Lo!"

With that Logan joined the cuddle pile in the middle of the room. They probably didn't let go for a long time.

Remy smiled at that sight and summoned his shades while sinking out. All was well in the mindscape again, his job here was done and he had a Starbucks to get.


End file.
